The Break Up

last week, i went to the doctor for my annual check up. it was generally routine: blood samples, urine sample, breathing into a strange plastic contraption for ten minutes with a nose clip on while drool pools in my bottom lip:

hunky dory. i made my follow up appointment for the next week and walked to the office. flash forward to this week, the day before my appointment when i get a voicemail:

wait a minute, did she just casually mention that they moved offices? in a week's time? why didn't they tell me this was happening last week when i was in?? i totally feel like i've been dumped, and the doctor knew it was coming, but waited until she had her new life ready to rip the bandaid off:

and as we all do in such situations, i racked my brain for signs of what was inevitably to come. i went over and over again the hour that i had been in the previous week to see what i could have possibly missed. sure the office was a bit of a wreck:

but the sign on the wall clearly assured me that it was just a teensy weensy messy during renovations:

you're probably thinking that this isn't the biggest deal you've ever heard. people move, if we like them, we take a leap and follow to the new location. but we didn't even talk about it! she just up and left and expected me to follow, even though the new office isn't near any train, my home, or my office. it's practically in the sticks:

so, i'm bummed. now i have to find a new doctor. unless i'm dying, in which case i won't have to find a new doctor after all. but in order to know whether or not i'm dying, i'd have to crawl back to my current doctor, and i'm just not ready to be that vulnerable in front of her. Sure, she's seen my exposed body, but she'll never see my exposed heart!