The Wisdom of Age

check it out:

closer:

closer:

leeeeeetle bit closer:

yuh! i'm thirty one years old, and i'm still growing in teeth like an infant. worse yet, the little bugger bit me on the tongue not five minutes ago:

sigh.

The Mangey Mutt

good luck! we think we figured out what's wrong with slurms mckenzie!

it appears to be scabies:

both scritch:

and scratch:

have been doing some pretty interesting itch dances:

additional bad luck, c.b. (whose pink eye is back) and i both appear to also have scabies, despite the internet telling us that they can't be passed from dogs to humans:

and it only took thousands of dollars and several months to figure out. yeah!

Hot and Cold

after five years of working in the same building, i finally figured out how to adjust the water temperature on the bathroom faucets:

it was a warm-handed miracle! unfortunately, i just moved to a new area in the building, and the faucets are different:

which means i'm back to having ice cold water on my hands:

literally nothing could be worse!

Hello to Arms

good luck:

 

 

i was complimented by a 9-year-old. they are notoriously the most critical of all the year-olds, and i received valuable constructive criticism that i'm basically perfect in arm strength. it's confirmed, i'm very strong. maybe even the strongest! don't worry, i know that with great power comes great responsibility, and i'm prepared to use my strength for good. well, i mean, until it's inconvenient....

Metro-policious

when i lost my wallet, i lost my metrocard. luckily, my sucker brother was willing to buy me a $10 card  to get me to a drinking hole:

and then, somehow, a second metrocard was in my bag:

and THEN when i went to buy a new card for my commute home, someone had left a weekly pass with a few days still left on it in the machine:

the mta is finally giving something back! (you know, besides a 24/7 way to get around so that i don't have to have a car.) yeah!

Cha-ching!

my credit cards came in record time:

i can spend again!!!

The Beat Goes on

things i've forgotten in the last 24 hours--

1. the money i borrowed from c.b. (left in my work pants pocket):

2. my passport (so i could drink with dinner):

3. to set my alarm:

4. to take my sunglasses off my head before putting my helmet on:

5. my socks:

senility, here i come! i mean, am!

And you are...?

here's the thing. i keep forgetting stuff. i've gone from having a sievey brain:

to having no brains at all:

seriously! i forgot my wallet on a plane. then i forgot my beloved phone, not once, not twice, but THREE TIMES over the past four days:

and then today, i forgot to bring clothes for after my bike ride:

i'd be really upset about it, if only i could remember to do so! oy.

The Last Place You Saw It

so...i lost my wallet:

you probably think that i coded that as good luck incorrectly, because having to cancel and replace every credit card number that you've memorized is a pain in the ass:

 true. total pain. HOWEVER, since i don't have access to any money at all, other people have to pay for things for me. and i can't say no. is this what it means to get a free ride?

suckers.