Such Great Heights

let's just cut right to it. i got stuck in an elevator:

with the baby:

when we got out, instead of being on the fifth floor--as i intended--we were on the first floor, and i had to walk up several flights of stairs so as not to get stuck in the elevator again:

everything is the worst.

CKNY

today is the anniversary of sandy:

it is also the anniversary of the day c.b. and i were supposed to go see louis c.k. live:

it was bad luck that we didn't get to go to the show (although super good luck that sandy didn't really affect us otherwise), but i DID remember a year later that we were supposed to get to see him next time he was in town, and this happened:
















followed by this:

and finally this:

no response! despite my enthusiastic use of the exclamation point! i guess the bad luck continues: since i no longer get to do anything past 6:00 pm, even if a new show came to town, i'd probably miss it. bummer.

Fading Away

so, i'd heard that after having a baby, the extra lush hair that didn't fall out during pregnancy would start vacating my scalp:

but, who cares? i've got such thick hair--thought i--that a few thousand won't make a difference:

I WAS WRONG. the horrible luck here is that my hair didn't fall out in convenient areas where no one would notice. NOPE:

i am now the proud owner of a receding hairline. and if that weren't enough, cabana baby has started ripping out fistfuls from underneath:

pretty soon i will be bald. which wouldn't be so bad except that winter is coming, and it's chilly! i should've listened when +virginia  warned me not to have children....

Property of Erin Elan

you guys, something wonderful has happened:

that's correct, property brothers is on netflix!

but this isn't all good luck, since i JUST finished my maternity leave and had to go back to work. i can't sit around watching it all day every day like i want:

but, since there are only three seasons, i suppose in the end, even that is kind of lucky.

welcome to the family, jonathan and drew!

Box of Furies

super annoying luck, everyone: someone has been using my pandora account. big deal, right? SHUT UP, IT'S A SUPER BIG DEAL because whoever it is likes:

(and presumably don't likes) music selections. i know what you're thinking. you're thinking, erin, your brain doesn't work, are you sure it's not you? well, skeptic reader, said person is even adding whole new stations:

and you can tell it's not me because of the mispellings. it's driving me crazy!

so if it's you, 'fess up and get your own account. it's free for crying out loud.

A Date with Destiny

i'm hoping that this will be some sort of cinderella tale, where all of my dreams come true:

it all started a couple of days ago when my sister introduced me to this little gem:

it was fate, i tell you! for those of you who don't know, my secret dream has ALWAYS* been to be a singer in a little hole-in-the-wall nightclub. you know, the kind littered with a few alcoholics here and there, a disillusioned detective who is always thinking about the cold case of his kid brother's disappearance, and the low life bookie in the corner looking to collect debts owed him:

unfortunately, my severe allergy to cigarette smoke made this dream impossible. frowny face:

enter scott bradlee, who is in the business of creating this exact look and feel, but without the smoky atmosphere:

that could be me!


so, scott bradlee, it's to you to fulfill my dreams. you have it in your power to provide good luck where previously there was only bad. you could change the world!

*to be honest, the singer dream came after dad dashed my dream to be a nun. apparently, there is no such thing as a jewish nun.

Poo-poo Platter

the other day, as i was changing cabana baby's diaper, he decided he wasn't finished and power sprayed me with poo:

i was glad that it was a direct hit to my clothing and not the bed linens, which are much bulkier to wash:

as i started to walk away--congratulating myself on a job well done--i slipped on more poo and nearly killed myself:

but cabana baby wasn't in my arms at the time, so was in no immediate danger. all in a day's work!

By the Seat of His Pants

good luck, everyone! i can fit in cb's pants once again:

it looks like i found my new uniform:

there's no stopping me now!

A Rose by Any Other Name...

bad luck, i can't remember to put on deodorant most days:

so i guess it's good luck that i don't smell that bad:*

*cb found out first-hand when i shoved his face in my armpit on the streets of new york. yeah!

Update: The Cleavage Issue

i'm not sure if this is good luck or bad luck...maybe you can weigh in.

maybe you've noticed a la this blog, but i've been wearing the same outfit all the time lately:

on the one hand, it's like i'm a cartoon character*:

or possibly a super hero:

but on the other, hand--since i don't have a closet full of the same outfit--maybe it's more like i'm a crazy, singing, bird feeding lady:

what say you?

UPDATE:

barret is right. frankly, i was trying to be pg about it and keep my cleavage out of the debate, but...well...it isn't fair to ask you to give an opinion without all the facts. so, without further adieu, the shirt:

*i'm aware that in blog form i am sort of a cartoon character.

Lost and Found

dare we hope that this blog is making a comeback?!?

When I'm 64

we are SO lucky! cb has been granted membership into a very elite club:

which obviously means we are now ready to retire and enjoy the finer things in life:

ima pop in my dentures and hit the town!

How Does it Feel??

THERE'S A PROPERTY BROTHERS CHANNEL IN THIS MUSIC VIDEO!!

yeah!!

Time Off and Time Out

years ago, back when people wrote letters on paper and dinosaurs ruled the earth:

a friend who had moved away publicly decreed via the united states postal service a new holiday: erin is the greatest day:

i never thought that day could be matched, but--joyously--brother bear did just that by naming this week:

this was our week! he's out of school, my last day in the office was wednesday, and we had plans to DO GREAT THINGS in the month between now and the impending baby birth:

but NO. because on tuesday night (2:45 in the morning to be precise) i woke up because i torrential downpoured all over the bed:

i seriously wasn't sure whether i peed* or, wait, did my water just break??

and even though c.b. and i just took lamaze last weekend, i couldn't remember under what circumstances it was time to go to the hospital:

but because the loch ness fetus was not even 36 weeks, we agreed to play it safe and go in.  and to make a short story even shorter, less than two hours later and a pretty convincing television style birth event, we had ourselves a healthy, teensy, roundheaded son:

and in about a month after brother bear and i get through my list of baby items to get done ahead of time, we'll be ready for him.







*cabana baby has NO problem with putting his giant cranium directly on my bladder rendering it utterly useless.